New Year Same Me New Train of Thought

Why would I change who I am just because a New Year begins, New Years Resolutions should be called New Day Resolutions.

I could change who I am to see the change that I want or I can change how I think to change the way that I see things” – Denise K.

Yes, all about perspectives. Not many people like to hear this, admit it and a lot less accept it, but the changes begin when we change the way we think.

The way we think will therefore make an impact on the way we see things, and yes we can always control our thoughts because after all our thoughts are a reflection of what abides in our hearts.

Even when we you feel bound by fears, anxiety, depression and have being deceived or are deceitful; there’s always new hope and new ways to change the way you think in order to change the way you perceive life and feel.

There’s always hopes, and there’s more within you that needs to come out, so while I am not a fan of the “New Year New Me” (ole) saying, I firmly believe that whether is a New Year or a New Day we should use the opportunity it brings to realign our thoughts and redesign our tomorrow.

Every morning comes with a new blessing, every day is a new gift and every night is another fulfilled and accomplished mission. You got to wake up, you get to make new choices and you made it through another day… that should be the way we think and the way we see things.

I know that’s not the way we think all the time, and most definitely not the way we feel at all times.

We are humans and we are bound to make mistakes, to fall and to feel defeated, but also to learn from our mistakes and to rise again. We were never created to stay on the ground nor to accept our fall and continue to make mistakes.

People tend to give up on their “New Years Resolutions” because they fail to stick to it, causing them to fail for the rest of the year, they don’t realize that they are given a New Day every day of that New Year to make resolutions that will take them into the next New Year with new goals and a broader vision of their futures.

“Life is much more than following the crowd, life is knowing where you’re going” -Denise K.

• Make realistic and achievable goals: Don’t make goals that will never be accomplished and or that no one will ever be able to achieve (even if they had all the money in the world).

• Know who you are and what you are capable of: What do you want? How do you see yourself? What needs to change?

• If you can’t do it on your own: Learn to accept it and leave your ego aside, seek for help; there’s always a friend, a family member, a mentor, a Pastor, a spouse, a counselor etc. waiting for you to reach out.

• Remember that you are not unbreakable: You are human and are bound to fail, acceptance is key to plan ahead.

Whether you do it at the end of this year or at the end of everyday, practice gratefulness.

1. Sit down and count your blessings, think about (at least) 5 things that have been given to you (although you are and undeserving human). Humble yourself at all times!

2. Reflect of what you have and how important this is to you.

3. Leave your worries aside and rest in the peace that gratefulness will bring to your feet.

You can make a New Years Resolution or a New Day Resolution.

1. You’re awake, that’s a blessing… give thanks, think about what you want to be different today, involve those who are important to you or are part of your day (family, spouse, co-workers, church members etc.) and if there’s anything that they need to be aware of communicate these things to them, i.e. today I want to live at peace, today I want to market more, today I want us to reach out to the homeless and feed them, and so on.

2. Get ready for what each day will bring, remember that not everyone thinks the same way, not everyone is equally committed to self and to others in life, as you may be. Be okay with disappointment, but never be an expectant of it. The way we think will change the way we feel (don’t forget).

3. Embrace yourself, walk with a new attitude everyday, positive vibes, new grace, better spirits, rejoicing and spreading love and giving new opportunities. Emotions are contagious, you can change the way other people feel by transmitting to them the way you feel… isn’t that awesome? (that will requiere a full session to explain; and I shall use the abbreviation “lol” for that). Let’s use that in a positive way and be mindful of we are.

4. Stand in your ground and ONLY allow positive, goodness and greatness to enter into your personal aura.

5. Be always ready to kick some butt, think like a warrior, walk like a warrior, think like a victorious person walk in victory, think like a person of changes make change happen.

Go on and live be flawless and stay connected.

There’s more to come!

Happy New Years… Happy New Day… Happy New Thoughts!

Love always -Denise Kilby

Get Up Stronger

“Pain and suffering can make us the biggest victim or the greatest victor” -DK.

antonika-chanel-467887Not many people are able to make a relation between pain, suffering, happiness and enjoyment. I don’t expect everyone to know and or understand this at first  hand but I will begin to explain.

Modifying your thoughts daily, perhaps every minute will allow you to focus on what you want without feeling incomplete for what you don’t have. This is not easy stuff, and it takes determination and commitment (self commitment).

Which is why most people don’t do it, because it can be easier to commit to others before we commit to self. We can become more faithful to those who hurt us than to ourselves, i.e. we set up a plan to go to the gym, eat healthier, and or read more but we are “ok” when we don’t do it. There’s always a next time when it comes to us, even if we feel bad inside or feel like we fail, we suppress and hide the feeling and become used to it to a point that eventually we no longer care anymore, we put our dreams to sleep and live in silent unhappiness with ourselves yet trying to please everyone else.

Now, when we give someone else our word , for example; I’ll be there at a certain time, or make a commitment with a neighbor to  pick up their little one from the bus stop, we make sure to be there on time, and if by any chance we aren’t able to make it we apologize and also verbally express to pour love ones (kids, or husband) how we feel about it. Yet, again when it comes to ourselves we keep our feeling run down by emotions.

A lot of times we are second in our list (if there’s only two people on it) and if there’s 10 we are that number 10 for sure, but we don’t give ourselves a 10 when we deserve it (are you following me?).

By distracting yourself from the pain and or situation that will require more attention (your feelings) you are prolonging pain, the idea of feeling and uncomfortable feeling is so scary that we run away from it (suppress it), worried that the emotion will overwhelm us and or devastate us. Know that emotions are temporary, you will only feel a certain way for a specific amount of time (the time you allow it), no one can make you feel more or less than what you really want.

This is why is important to understand how to manage your emotion and separate your feelings from them. Pain can be a factor that alters our emotions, constant suffering can damage our feelings, but it doesn’t have to be in control of our happiness. Don’t allow pain and suffering to determine whether you will enjoy your life or not.

Be in control of who you are, connect with your inner self and admit, that you are able to rise up stronger, yes, you can get up stronger. The place where you may be now is not your home (your feelings), that place is temporary (your emotions), be determined and reach out!

Pain and mistreatment can be a factor of depression, some people allow the feeling of sadness to create a “temporary” feeling of grief in their heart (which is healthy and ok to a certain extend), or an eternal and heavy burden in their lives. Are you ready to stop being a victim of the situation and become a victor and come up stronger from the circumstances?  #balance

“Situations, circumstances, and emotions are all temporary, but feelings are long-lasting. Don’t let “the” today determine how you will feel tomorrow.” 

– Denise Kilby

Small Changes Lead to Big Accomplishment!


It may take some of us longer than others to adapt to new changes and to see the “why” of things, but believe me when they say “everything happens for a reason” #everythinghappensforareason there’s a purpose for everything and everyone!

•Approaching changes with confidence of who you are, will allow you to connect with the “inner you” (your soul), let’s face it; you will begin to realize that you can if you try, and that will open up your mind to new ideas enabling you to always aim higher.

• Things are meant to change and we are meant to grow in life!

• Make sure to live your life happy with who you are, not simply in mental contempt, as mental contempt leads to satisfaction but happiness leads to bigger achievements.

“…don’t adapt to this world, have the world adapt to who you are” -DK.

• Think of yourself as an extraordinary person, you’re not ordinary!

• See beyond a picture and look for the story behind it, expand your thinking #criticalthinker and remember that everyone has a story to tell.

What’s yours, are you creating your story?

Start today, you’re not average #youremore  you are not ordinary, you’re extraordinary, not of this world, expand your view of life!

#extraordinary #notofthisworld #changes #unapologetic #beyou #live #love #give #believe #havefaith # #trustGod #goformore #evolve #happyholidays #merrychristmas #smallchanges #bigview

Lets connect and stay tune for more!


Mount up with wings like the eagles!


“But those who wait on The Lord Shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings like the eagles, They shall run and not be weary, They shall walk and faint.” (Isaiah 40:31 NKJV)

Ordinary people will never understand this, but I do. I know what it is to wait for things I never thought would come through, I know what is it to pray when I feel like crying to cry when is time to pray out of confusion. But most importantly I know what it is to wait because I believe in the word of God…and if I wait for Him to act on His appointed time (not mine) I will eventually mount up with wings like the eagles.

I consider myself to be extraordinary, therefore I believe in extraordinary things. I believe that if pray great things are to happen, I believe that if I fall I will get back up stronger; now do you see that? I said I will get back stronger…not just get back up.

Ordinary people get back up, but extraordinary people get back stronger. Show those around you that you are not of this world even if you live in it. In my case I am walking the process that will take me to my destiny (something that only extraordinary people get), I am renewing strength, don’t celebrate if you see me down – (get ready, I’m coming back stronger). I am walking ( there’s a purpose) and even if I feel like I am fainting I will not faint…(ha, brace yourself).

  • Ask yourself, am I coming back stronger of whatever situation I may be in?
  • Is this producing fruit that will be worth passing on to my legacy?
  • Am I just living like the reast, breathing and waiting for my time of death, or am I living like the extraordinary people…going for more and rising up from the aches?

Diamonds are form in the dirt (in the deepest of it indeed), they are sorted (picked/chosen), they are polished with fire (burned to get the best out of them), then they are cut (sometimes being cut hurts but is necessary), and finally they are graded (what would you grade yoursel?) and delivered to be displayed (are you ready for everyone to see what you are made of?). 

Don’t be just another stone…be a diamond. Connect with your sould without fear of being burn and cut.

Now, I have a question, are you renewing your strengths, or simply waiting to become more weary until you faint because the process is too painful?

Stew on it, keep scrolling comment and or email me for a more private chat. #theresmore


“This crusade is the path that will lead me to the battle, but I rest easy…that war is not mine to fight” -Denise Kilby



Fix your eyes on greatness

“Let’s look at our lives how no one else ever will” – DK.

A positive mind is much easier to persuade…

• Let’s be positive and focus on the great things (we DO have) rather than on the not so great (the ones we don’t ).

• I’m a firm believer that is of utmost importance to look back from time to time.

• Take a glance look back at life

•If you made it this far you will advance much more.

• Be grateful and count your blessing

• Don’t ever be afraid to do something for yourself.

•Be caring, learn from others, what to and what not to do.

• Be unique, conquer, fight, don’t give up, share goodness, good vibes, be positive, love others, be kind, be genuine, but most importantly #BeYou

“In every heart is a hidden gem waiting to come out and make an impact in someone else’s life” Denise Kilby

Stay tune for this and more, contact me for some private advice and guidance!

Stay blessed and bless others.

Seek happiness

Happiness doesn’t come from big pieces of great success, but from small advantages hammered out day by day.” – Jim Rohn

I have great plans for my lie; for the person I want to become, and for the world I want to contribute and give back to. I know that if I stay still when life circumstances puts a pause ✋🏼 on my life/day, that hiatus can become a permanent or very long stop 🛑, so I work with what I can and do as much as I can given the set of environmental situations.

Today may not await, life will continue to happen and I must live to be part of it. In order for me to fulfill my God given destiny I must strive for success.

Every morning whether I am having a bad flare (for those who don’t know I Fight Fibromyalgia on a daily basis) or not I say to myself “today will be a great day” before I begin to complain I commence to give thanks 🙏🏽.

We have received far more than what we have given in this life; don’t forget to take advantage of the given opportunities instead of complaining for the given situations.

I read spiritual, educational, motivational and inspirational articles to help me redirect myself, I meditate on what I have and ask for guidance, I write to inspire, motivate, clear my mind, challenge myself and never forget.

So when life tries to stop me in one area of my life I use it as a stepping stone to advance to my tomorrow.

#study #educateyourself #clearyourmind #reconnect #takeadvantage #situations #circumstances #opportunities #getup #fight #run #live #love #try #freetherapy #enjoy #undertheweather #abovetheclouds #iamthestorm

If you need help remembering who you are, think about how far you’ve come” – Denise K.

Keep scrolling and contact me for more information on how to seek your true happiness.

Can you hear your teenager’s (silent) cry?


“A baby will grow to be an adult one day but that baby will never stop being your child” DK.

Most adolescents feel trapped living a life that doesn’t belong to them but again that they don’t know how to escape from. Teenagers go with the crowd only to realize later on in their adult life that they lived a life that wasn’t for them, leaving them with regrets and a sour taste of the most glorious and potentially most beautiful years of their lives. All teenagers experience a stage called Pathological Narcissism, and while they may appear to be “okay” and act like they have it all under control portraying a selfish, self-centered egocentric image, the reality is that a lot of teens are nowadays crying inside. Adolescents are fragile individuals, who might appear as though they’re pushing you away in their silent attempts to draw you closer, all  your child want is for you to be closer and understand.

Giving space doesn’t necessarily mean “go away”.

-Sometimes a hug can help shape their lives-

Have you noticed your adolescent’s cry for help? Do you know how to identify it? Do you need help identifying your own child’s cry? When was the last time you hugged your teen? Do you still have dinner together (at home)?

If any of the above seem to hit close to home, reach out to me:

• Learn how to help without being noticed

• Obtain information to understand their silent cry

• Learn about alternatives, to be away from your teen but having your child around adults most of the time.

• Learn your children’s signs of depression, anxiety and eating disorder

If you’re a teen: Do you feel trap as if no-one understands? Tired of the same vague therapy, and of being treated like a kid? Do you want to connect with your parents again?

•Learn how to get closer to your parents

• Understand that they just want to help

• Parents distance because they think that’s what you want – Learn how to let them know they’re wrong without making the distance even grater

• Obtain coping skills & learn about alternatives; and how to help a friend who may be experiencing the same.

Adolescents under 18 need parents permission to connect, but you can feel free to follow read and revisit the page anytime.


“We are created to help, to live and to help live…are you living?” -Denise Kilby

Keep scrolling, #letsconnect


Get Up Stronger


“At times is necessary to touch bottom and be laid flat on the ground to realize how much higher from it we belong” -DK.

I am not saying live in the clouds and act as though you’re better than everyone around, but I am trying to say instead is that the best comes out when we’re in our lowest place. Suffering can increase your motivation, it is during our hardest moment that we realize that “something’s gotta give” things can’t remain the same, you need to make a change.

If you’re so cut up from what you’re going through you can either tell yourself “I will never make it, I’m not enough, this is always the same, I knew this would fail, why even try?, everyone lives better than me, everyone looks better than me…etc.etc.” or you can hit the switch connect with the inner beauty that lives within you and tell your beautiful soul; “I will make it and if I don’t make now, I will try again, I am more and I am loving myself, this time it will not be the same, I know I will not fail and if it doesn’t work out I am ok with that, I will always try, I will live the live I want, I look as good as God because I am made in His image and likeness, and so on and so on… learn how look up right from where you are, use that ground to step on it.

Recondition your brain, revalue who you are. Find the purpose of the pain, think what it has to offer, what would come out of it. Although you may not know the answer now I’m one hundred percent sure that if you practice this every time you feel down, or left down you will learn to cast your eyes on the things that are higher and find yourself there all alone.

Your inner kid is still inside yearning for help and approval and you are the only one who can provide this comfort and reassurance. But you will not realize this until you love yourself fully and accept all the pieces of yourself.

“We come alone to a world filled with millions of souls, we leave this world and we get to take one…our own” -Denise K.


For more information and to connect with me keep scrolling and reach out, hold my hand and know that you’re not alone ☺#reachout

Bring out the calm you


Do you often feel unable to control your thoughts and worries, always thinking about your job, your relationships, your health, or simply everything and everyone all at once? We will always worry about the things that matter the most to us, after all, it is an understandable part of our human nature to care for those we love, and make sure that the things we value are going just well.

Now, this doesn’t mean that you have to become self-sabotage. Have you been more anxious than ever lately (or does it seem like it at least)? Are you questioning your image, your weight, unable to control small situations, feeling like your getting older, scared of not aging successfully, or overall unhappy?

If you answered “yes” to any of those questions you’re not alone, I have been there, they have been there, you’re there; we’ve all been there! Anxiety disorders are the most common mental illness affecting over 40 million  Americans today (imaging the rest of the world), and including a long list of hard to identify symptoms. Know that there’s more within you, that you are more than what you think, that things are not as bad as they seem, and again, you’re not alone.

Believe it or not there are ways to turn off your anxiety without medication and with self meditation, reconnecting with the inner you who (is anxious) wants to come out.

Fixating on your past, being fearful of your future and not being connected with yourself in the present moment will take a toll on your mental, emotional and physical health.

Now is the time to learn some meditation techniques, lets activate those endorphins in your brain. Let me teach you how to make them act as sedatives to calm that anxiety and get re-rooted to your ground.

It’s time to shut off your anxiety and turn on your life!

“You can’t say that you’re living if you’re not enjoying your life” Denise Kilby

Ps. Email me for more info, tell me how I can help #thereshope